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Championship Result

• #3 seeded Tappa Kegga Day beat #8 seed SIAP, 79.09 – 78.17. SIAP set the perfect lineup, but their second highest scoring player was their backup QB and they received subpar performances from several players who had helped them get to this point. Brandon Jabobs’ injury didn’t help either. TKD was led by Marques Colston and Jason Campbell, and was able to pull off the win despite leaving a bunch of points on the bench. The all-time series between these two clubs is now tied at 8 wins each, but TKD holds a 2-0 advantage in the postseason (both championship games), which is where it really counts. This is also the first time since 1998 that the winning team didn’t score 80 points. SIAP is now 12-6 in the postseason, including 2-2 in championship games. Similarly, TKD is 11-5 in the playoffs and an identical 2-2 in championships.

Championship Record Watch

• With a 0.92 point victory margin, this was the closest Super Bowl in league history. It’s worth noting that the 6 closest championships have occurred in the last 6 years, and this is the 3rd time in 4 years that the big game was decided by fewer than 2 points.
• Matt Schaub’s 27.4 point performance is the 3rd highest individual player performance in a Super Bowl in the player stats era (2004-present)
• The combined point total of 157.26 makes this the fourth lowest scoring championship game ever.
• SIAP’s 78.17 and TKD’s 79.09 are the 9th and 10th lowest point totals in championship history, respectively.
• TKD now has 11 postseason wins, one behind SIAP’s record 12.
• TKD’s .688 playoff winning percentage is 4th best overall and tops among active teams. SIAP is right behind, at .667.
• TKD joins SIAP and The Hip as the only three franchises in PFFL history to win two championships. And yeah… those three teams have won half of the 12 championships to-date.
• TKD won its 100th overall (regular season + playoffs) this week and is the third team to do so.

Toilet Bowl Result

• The Jedi Masters captured their first ever Toilet Bowl championship, beating The Hip.

Franchise Ratings

View the Franchise Ratings

• Only twice before had a team reached a perfect 100.0 (the max) on the franchise rating scale. SIAP was the first to hit the mark following their championship season in 2004 and The Jedi Masters hit the mark last year. Well, four teams are rated perfectly today. TKD’s championship run, Post Mortem’s winning season, The Jedi Masters’ high points mark and SIAP’s second place finish (combined with their strong ratings to-date) rank all four as the most valuable franchises in the league.
• DDT surpassed Double D as the fifth most highly rated team in the league — both are four star franchises
• SaaBB’s division championship added a full star to their rating, while The Hip basically held steady and Winning Beer Money lost a half star.
• Hedfullalicker had a great season and is certainly a team on the upswing value-wise, but their lack of playoff success has them right in the middle with 2.5 stars.
• Turd Ferguson and Kramerica Industries both gained a half star, giving their stockholders reason to be optomistic.
• At the bottom, Camel Toe and CSPJ both achieved the lowest possible scores and are zero-star franchises.

Championship Recap Babe

Doutzen Kroes is a Victoria’s Secret model from the Netherlands, meaning she’s not shy about showing off her naught bits.

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As we reach the conclusion of another year, let me take this opportunity to wish you all a happy and safe holiday week. I hope you all get to spend it with your families and friends.

Merry Christmas!

View the Week 17 Game Center

Championship Matchup

• (3) Tappa Kegga Day vs (8) SIAP > This week’s championship game is a rematch of the PFFL title game from 10 seasons ago. TKD won the 1998 championship over SIAP, 109-78. It is the only other time these two original franchises have met in the postseason. In the overall series, this will be the 16th meeting in a matchup that SIAP leads, 8-7. As division rivals in the East this season, these two teams split their two games. TKD won in week 4, while SIAP won in the regular season finale. This is the fourth championship game appearance for both teams. SIAP won the title in 2000 (as the West champ and 3-seed) and 2004 (as the West champ and 2-seed), but lost in the aforementioned matchup with TKD in 1998. TKD won their only title in 1998 as the 8-seed, and lost in the championship game in their other two East Division winning seasons (1997 and 2005, as the 1 and 3 seed, respectively).

PFFL Championship History

A little recap of the PFFL championship games of years gone by:

Toilet Bowl Championship Matchup

• The Jedi Masters seek their first ever Toilet Bowl title in the first appearance in the little dance, while The Hip is looking for their second Toilet Bowl title, in their third Toilet Bowl championship appearance.

Coming Next Week

Be sure to check back next week after all the fantasy action has concluded for the year. Not only will I recap the 2008 postseason, but it will also be time to unveil the updated PFFL Franchise Ratings! Has your team increased or decreased in value this year? I’ll also run down the final financial totals for each team. Happy Holidays!

Championship Preview Babes

A whole collection of ladies in Christmas-themed attire. Most of them look more naughty than nice.

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View the Week 16 Game Center

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Semifinal Results

• (8) SIAP 129.54 def (5) Turd Ferguson 104.83 > SIAP continued its impressive postseason, with 7 of 8 players in double digits this week. It all started with Jones-Drew and Wayne on Thursday night, continued with Jacobs’ 3 TDs on Sunday night and concluded with a two turnover/one block Monday night performance from the Bears’ D. For Turd Ferguson, they played like the game was over after Thursday when Garrard and Dallas Clark staked them to an early lead. With Bowe, Andre Johnson and AP all coming up small, however, Turd’s chance at a championship appearance vanished. SIAP now has a 3-game win streak against Turd, and leads the overall series, 10-6.
• (3) Tappa Kegga Day 91.53 def (2) Sharp as a Bowling Ball 53.78 > For the second straight week, TKD stayed alive largely due to a fortunate matchup, although at least the winning score this week was a little more respectable. TKD had Joseph Addai in the lineup on Thursday, and his gooseegg certainly wasn’t a good start, but solid, double digit performances from 6 of his 7 other players on Sunday made up for the rough start. Meanwhile, SaaBB was in trouble from the moment that Anquan Boldin was announced as “out” and got worse when Kurt Warner was completely ineffective in the snow and subsequently benched. Those two players had single-handedly gotten SaaBB to this point, so missing even a “good” performance from each of them spelled disaster. TKD’s win was a mark of revenge for a loss 3 weeks ago during the regular season. SaaBB still holds the overall series advantage at 9-6, but TKD has a 2-0 record over SaaBB in the playoffs.

Playoff Record Watch

• SIAP’s current record of 12 postseason wins is safe at least until the 2009 playoffs. TKD is second on the list with 10.
• SaaBB ties Post Mortem’s mark of 9 postseason losses (the result of similar playoff success — 9 of 12 years in the postseason, 0 championships)
• Both SIAP and TKD will be making their fourth championship game appearance, a league record given that no other team has made it more than twice.
• Turd Ferguson became only the 7th team in PFFL history to accumulate 1000 postseason points
• SIAP’s 129.54 point performance is the 9th highest score in postseason history
• SaaBB’s 53.78 point output is the 8th lowest score in the PFFL playoffs
• After participating in a postseason record-setting performance for combined high points last week, Turd Ferguson is on the list again in 4th place this week, as the SIAP-Turd battle totaled 234.37 points
• Turd’s 104.83 points is the 5th highest score in a losing postseason effort
• Turd’s 123.17 points-per-game average in the 2008 postseason is the 4th highest average score in PFFL playoff history

Toilet Bowl Results

• The Jedi Masters beat Double D for their first ever Toilet Bowl win
• The Hip beat Winning Beer Money and now owns a 6-1 Toilet Bowl record

Playoff Recap Babe

Kristen Bell might be only like 4′ 5″ but she’s mighty cute. And she wishes good luck to both of this week’s semifinal winners.

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Playoff Semifinal Matchups

One game this week is a rematch of a game played just three weeks ago, while the other is the first meeting of the year. Week 15 saw 2 of 4 lower seeds advance. Will we see any upsets this week? To decide the matchup for the 2008 PFFL Championship game:

• (8) SIAP vs (5) Turd Ferguson – This is the first meeting of the year for these two clubs who made the playoffs as wild cards and scored upset victories in round 1. Despite not playing in ’08, these two are familar foes, as this will be their 16th meeting in PFFL history. SIAP leads that series, 9-6, and swept Turd last year when they were division rivals. This is their first ever meeting in the postseason. SIAP is 3-2 in semi-final games, while Turd Ferguson is 1-2 and has not advanced to a championship game since 1999.
• (3) Tappa Kegga Day vs (2) SaaBB – Back in week 13, SaaBB beat TKD by 20 to lock up the #2 seed in the playoffs and the 2-point head start that could come in handy this week. While this is the 16th all-time meeting of these two clubs, it is only their second faceoff in the postseason. In PFFL’s innagural season of 1997, TKD beat SaaBB, 89-74 in the semi-finals. TKD is an impressive 3-1 in the semifinal playoff round, while SaaBB struggles in this round, going 1-6 in their opportunities to make it to the big game.

Toilet Bowl Matchups

• (3) Winning Beer Money vs (2) The Hip – The Hip is an impressive 5-1 in Toilet Bowl action, while WBM picked up their first consolation round 1 (in 2 tries) last week.
• (5) Double D vs (1) The Jedi Masters – Double D is now 1-0 in the toilet bowl, while this is the first ever toilet game for TJM.

Semifinal Preview Babe

Marissa Miller has made a few appearances in the PFFL Blog this year, so it seemed appropriate to provide some pictures from her 2009 calendar as we near the end of the PFFL year. Joel is probably already printing this out…

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Playoff Week 1 Results

• (8) SIAP took out (1) Post Mortem and is now 2-0 against PM in the postseason. This also continued a trend started in 2005. In the last six meetings between these clubs, the winner has alternated from the previous meeting. SIAP now leads the all-time series, 8-7. Post Mortem now has a 5-9 postseason record, including 5 first round eliminations. SIAP improves to 11-5 in playoff action, including an impressive 6-2 in round 1.
• (2) SaaBB held on to defeat (7) Kramerica Industries, ending a 3-game KI win streak in their all-time series, which SaaBB now leads, 6-3. Kramerica is 2-3 all-time in the postseason, while SaaBB is now 9-8, with only one first-round loss in 9 postseason appearances.
• (3) Tappa Kegga Day beat (6) DDT in a low-scoring affair. Of the eight playoff teams, these two teams had the lowest scores this week. Seeds matter. This was TKD’s second straight win over DDT after a loss back in week 6, but DDT still leads the overall matchup, 7-5. The postseason series is knotted up at 1-1. DDT is 4-6 in the playoffs, including 3-3 in the first round. TKD improves to 9-5 in the playoffs and is in the second round for the first time since 2005.
• (5) Turd Ferguson upset (4) Hedfullalicker in the highest-scoring matchup of the week. In fact, this game had the two highest scoring teams of the 8 playoff qualifiers. Again, seeds matter. After a week 1 loss, Turd has now won two straight against Hedfull, and the overall series is now tied, 7-7. Hedfullalicker is now a dismal 2-8 in the playoffs, including first round elimination in seven of his eight postseason appearances. Turd improves to 5-6 in the postseason, including a 4-3 record in round 1.

Playoff Record Watch

• SIAP’s 11th playoff win extends their record number of playoff wins. SaaBB and TKD are now tied for 2nd with 9 wins each.
• Post Mortem now has more playoff losses than any other team in PFFL history, with 9. SaaBB needs a championship run to avoid tying that mark this year, while Hedfullalicker is comfortably in 2nd place with 8.
• Turd Ferguson’s 141.51 point output this week is the 6th highest in postseason history.
• The matchup between Turd and Hedfullalicker set a new postseason mark for most combined points, with 254.72.
• The TKD-DDT total score of 140.42 is the 10th lowest ever in a playoff game.
• TKD’s 76.15 points are the 6th lowest in a playoff win
• Hedfullalicker’s 113.21 is the 2nd highest score in a playoff loss

Toilet Bowl

• Double D beat CSPJ by 0.36 points to advance to the semi-finals against The Jedi Masters
• Winning Beer Money beat Camel Toe by almost 15 to advance to play The Hip

Playoff Recap Babe

Meet Tamara Witmer, Playboy centerfold and fan of the postseason.

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A few stat changes in week 14 — none of which impacted game results (breathe easy, Tim)

• 3 yards were added to Adrian Peterson’s rushing total, adding 0.3 points to Turd Ferguson’s total
• Donovan McNabb had 4 yards removed from his rushing total as a sack previously awarded to the Giants was changed to a negative rushing play. This lowered DDT’s score by 0.4 because of McNabb and lowered The Jedi Masters’ score by 1 because the Giants D lost a sack.

Stat Change Babe

In addition to peddling Sconnie wear on campus, the Sconnie Girls are also huge proponents of accepting stat changes.

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1. Only teams alive in the championship round of the playoffs are allowed to make waiver moves
2. Players can only be added in the case of a newly injured player. In other words, the injured player must have been active or listed as no worse than probable in the previous week.
3. The added player must be the same position as the injured player
4. The injured player does NOT have to be dropped — any player can be dropped to make room for the injury replacement

And a quick reminder about the playoffs – there is home field advantage in play in the first two rounds. So the better seed gets a 2-point head start.

View the Week 15 Game Center

Playoff Quarterfinal Matchups

All of the first round matchups in this year’s postseason are rematches of contests held earlier this year. In two of the four games, the teams involved are from the same division and split their season series. On top of all that, 3 of the four matchups this week are between teams who have met in the playoffs before. On to the history…

• (8) SIAP vs (1) Post Mortem: Post Mortem beat SIAP in week 12, 81.41 – 75.36, in a low-scoring affair. That win evened the overall series tally at 7-7, but SIAP has a 1-0 advantage in postseason play, with a 116-80 win over Post in the 2000 semi-finals. SIAP has not won a playoff game since their 2004 championship run (granted, they only have one playoff game since then), but are 5-2 in first round playoff games. Post Mortem is 4-4 in the first round of the playoffs, and has advanced to round 2 in 2 of the last 3 seasons. Side note: PM has three West division titles and has now been seeded in all three of the available division winner spots, #2 in 1997, #3 in 2001 and now #1.
• (7) Kramerica Industries vs (2) Sharp as a Bowling Ball: Kramerica beat SaaBB waaaaaaaaay back in week 1, 66.31 – 49.79. That was KI’s third straight win over SaaBB, including a 90.12 – 52.21 win in the playoff semi-finals last year. Before the current Kramerica streak, SaaBB had dominated this series, winning the first five meetings. Kramerica is 1-1 in the first round of the playoffs, and is coming off of a 2007 season that saw them make a run all the way to the title game. In 8 playoff appearances, SaaBB has lost in the first round only one time, back in 1998. The second round is their nemesis, as they are 1-6 in the semis.
• (6) Duany Duany Tanning vs (3) Tappa Kegga Day: These two East division rivals split their season series. DDT won in week 6, while TKD returned the favor in week 12. DDT holds an overall 7-5 series advantage, which includes a 12-point win in the first round of the 2006 playoffs. DDT is 3-for-5 in the first round, but is actually 2-0 as a wild card. Tappa Kegga Day, meanwhile, has not won a playoff game since advancing to the 2005 title game. Losses in the first round in 2006 and 2007 ended TKD’s perfect 4-0 first round record prior to that time.
• (5) Turd Ferguson vs (4) Hedfullalicker: Both teams hail from the West division. Hedfullalicker won the first meeting of their division series, in week 1, with Turd getting the victory in week 10 to earn the season split. Hed leads the overall series 7-6. This is their first ever postseason meeting. Turd Ferguson is an even .500 in the first round, going 3-3, but without a playoff win since 2005. Hedfullalicker has been one of the hardest luck postseason teams in PFFL history. From 1997-2004, Hed reached the playoffs six times, but never made it out of the first round. That streak finally came to an end in 2006 when Hedfull not only won in round 1, but advanced all the way to the championship game.

Toilet Bowl Matchups

The Jedi Masters and The Hip get byes into the semi-final round of the Toilet Bowl, but the bottom 4 teams in the league square off this week. Among the six teams in the Toilet Bowl competition, only one has ever won a Toilet game — The Hip, who bring an impressive 5-1 Toilet record to the table.

• (6) Camel Toe vs (3) Winning Beer Money: Camel Toe is 0-2 in the Toilet round, but both losses came against The Hip (who would be their 2nd round opponent). Winning Beer Money has only one Toilet Bowl game under their belt, a loss to SIAP in 2005.
• (5) Double D vs (4) CSPJ: Double D is making their first ever appearance in the Toilet Bowl, while CSPJ is here for the third straight season, but has never made it to the 2nd toilet round.

Playoff Preview Babe

Abigail Clancy is another of the hot models to come out of the UK, so she’s probably more into fantasy soccer than football, but I’m willing to let that slide.

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View the Week 14 Game Center

View the Automated Week 14 Recaps at myFantasyLeague

Week 14 Highlights

• DDT prevented Kramerica from winning the East division, ending a three-game losing streak to KI and earning a season split of their divisional series. DDT leads the career matchup, 5-4.
• SIAP earned the split in the season series with TKD, a win which also moved them into the playoffs, ended a three-game losing streak to the Keggers and gives them a one-game lead in the all-time series, 8-7.
• For the second straight year, Camel Toe beat Post Mortem to end the regular season. Of course, this win is only by 0.51 point, and we’ve seen how that can come back to haunt Camel before. CT leads this series, 2-1.
• Hedfullalicker ended The Hip’s postseason hopes by earning a season sweep and cutting into The Hip’s overall series lead, which now stands at 9-7.
• Turd Ferguson erased any possibility of getting locked out of the postseason with a win over Double D. Turd has won 5 of the last 6 meetings with DD and leads all-time, 7-2.
• The Jedi Masters earned high points for the week, but didn’t get the SIAP loss they needed to make the playoffs. Their season sweep earning win over CSPJ does give them a 4-2 all-time matchup lead, however. So, there’s that.
• SaaBB beat Winning Beer Money to earn a season sweep and an 11-3 record on the year. This is their 3rd straight win over WBM and moves SaaBB into a 6-5-1 series advantage.

PFFL Survivor

CSPJ recovered from their pitiful week 13 performance to put up over 100 points this week. It wasn’t enough to catch SaaBB, however, as the Bowling Ballers win Survivor 2008, 187.51 – 155.69.

SaaBB gets $100 for the win, while CSPJ gets $40 for making it this far.

View the final Survivor Standings

Postseason Qualifiers

1. West Division Champ: Post Mortem — earns the #1 seed based on a head-to-head win over SaaBB

2. Central Division Champ: Sharp as a Bowling Ball

3. East Division Champ: Tappa Kegga Day — wins a three-way tiebreak with DDT and Kramerica due to a 3-1 head-to-head record within this group (DDT was 2-2, KI was 1-3)

Wild Cards:

4. Hedfullalicker — at 9-5, the third best record in the league

5. Turd Ferguson — DDT is the higher ranked team in the East due to a better division record than Kramerica, so this came down to Turd vs DDT. The two did not play each other this season, so the next criteria was total points, which Turd wins by just under 7.

6. Duany Duany Tanning — beating Kramerica based on better division record

7. Kramerica Industries — best remaining record

8. SIAP — at 7-7, the best remaining record

Single Game Record Watch

• For the second time this season, Camel Toe was involved in a game that makes the list of top 10 closest games in PFFL history. Last time, it started out as the closest, then flipped to 4th closest after a stat change gave DD the win. This week, Camel beat Post Mortem by .51 points (pending another change) in the 7th closest game ever.

Season Record Watch

• Post Mortem and SaaBB join 8 other teams in a tie for 4th best regular season record with 11 wins.
• Camel Toe’s 11 losses ranks them with 10 other teams in 3rd on the most losses in a season list.
• The Jedi Masters’ season point total of 1438.61 is the 8th best season total in league history. This is the second consecutive season that has seen the Jedis score the most points in the league.
• Camel Toe’s 950.28 point total is the 9th lowest all-time and the fewest points scored in a season since Hedfullalicker’s 938 in 2001.
• As mentioned last week, Post Mortem and SIAP both finished the year with 5-1 non-division records, tied with a slew of other teams for 7th best non-division performance.
• The Jedi Masters’ 3rd high point week of the season ties them for 10th most HP weeks in a season with 6 other teams. It is also the most HP weeks by one team in a season since TKD had 4 in 2006.
• Hedfullalicker and SaaBB both closed the regular season with 4-game win streaks. That is tied for 8th most wins to end a season with 5 other franchises.

Career Performance Record Watch

• Post Mortem ended the season with 97 career regular season wins, 7 ahead of SIAP, who sits in 2nd with 90.
• The Hip has 87 career regular season losses, also 7 ahead of their nearest competitor, SaaBB, who has 80.
• Post Mortem gained ground this year on High Life’s 2-season career winning pct mark of .589. At .580, this difficult-to-beat record is becoming a possibility.
• Post Mortem leads the all-time regular season scoring list with 15,446.22 career points. The Hip remains in second place with 14,911.16 but is being pressured by Hedfullalicker’s 14,861.29.
• Post Mortem also has a 1-point lead in the regular season Points Per Game category, with 91.9, one better than DDT’s 90.9 and The Jedi Masters’ 90.7 per game averages.
• The Jedi Masters have a .585 winning percentage in division games, slightly better than DDT’s .581
• Post Mortem and SIAP are the only teams in PFFL history to have recorded 50 division wins
• Hedfullalicker has lost the most division games, with 45.
• Despite recording none this year, Post Mortem still has the most high point weeks in PFFL history, with 18.5

Postseason Record Watch

• Post Mortem and SaaBB are each making their league-leading 9th playoff appearance
• Hedfullalicker and SIAP are next in line, making their 8th visit to the postseason, while TKD and Turd are in for the 7th time and DDT makes it for the 6th.
• In terms of frequency, other than the two teams that made the playoffs in the only season in the league, DDT (6/8), Post Mortem (9/12) and SaaBB (9/12) have the best appearance frequency at 75%.
• Tappa Kegga Day won their 4th division title, good for second most in league history to TJM’s 5. For Post Mortem and SaaBB, it was their 3rd division crown each.
• Hedfullalicker and Turd are tied for the league lead in wild card appearances with 6.
• Post Mortem and TKD are in the postseason for the fourth consecutive season, the longest active streaks in the league.

Milestone Watch

A recap of Milestones reached in 2008:

• DDT scored their 10,000th regular season point in week 13, tying Post Mortem as the fastest teams to that mark
• Post Mortem scored its 15,000th regular season point in week 9, after 163 regular season matchups.
• In week 2, DDT scored their 10,000th point overall (including regular season and playoffs), the fastest team ever to this mark.
• DDT recorded their 5,000th division point in week 1
• DDT achieved their 50th win overall (regular + post- season) in week 3, fastest to this mark.
• Two teams recorded their 100th win overall (regular + post-season). Post Mortem did it in week 9, and SIAP hit this milestone in week 14.
• Post Mortem and SIAP also became the first teams to record 50 division wins, in weeks 11 and 14, respectively.
• CSPJ’s week 14 loss was their 50th overall PFFL loss (regular + post-season), making them the second fastest team to this milestone, behind Kramerica. In comparison, DDT hit this mark in week 5, after 112 games — 25 more than CSPJ took.
• In week 8, DDT suffered its 25th division loss, taking the second longest time to hit the mark.
• TKD’s 95-point victory over DDT in week 12 is only the 5th 90+ point win in PFFL history

Individual Team Record Watch

• Camel Toe’s 3-11 record continues a trend where they lose 2 more games with each new year (7 losses in 2006, 9 in 2007, 11 in ’08). I’m really not sure what’s going to happen in 2010.
• CSPJ finished below .500 for the third straight year, and has now won 12 games in the last three seasons, combined.
• Double D finished with the worst season record in franchise history, ending a streak of three consecutive postseason-making years.
• DDT has finished 8-6 for the third time in the last three even numbered years.
• Since 2000, Hedfullalicker is 5-for-5 in postseason qualifying in even years, but 0-4 in odd years. This season was the most points scored in Hedfullalicker franchise history, as well as the most points allowed.
• For Kramerica, history shows that scoring more than 1200 points in a season gets them into the playoffs. Anything less? Toilet Bowl time.
• Post Mortem has made the playoffs four straight years, and 8 of the last 9. This club has never finished the season with fewer than 6 wins. This year’s 1340 points is the third highest point total in franchise history, and the division title this season is the third in team history, all in the West.
• SaaBB’s 11-3 record is the best in team history, as is their 1378.92 point total. This is the team’s 3rd division title (2nd in the Central with a West crown thrown in for good measure), and the 2nd seed matches their best ever playoff seeding.
• This is SIAP’s first ever 8-seed in the postseason. The 7-7 record this year is very similar to 2002′s team performance. Points Scored: 1269.57 (2008) – 1258 (2002), Points Against: 1286.14 (2008) – 1295 (2002). The lone difference? In 2002, that record wasn’t good enough to make the playoffs.
• TKD now has a .500 or better record in four straight seasons, and their 3rd East Divison title (plus one in the Central). This is the second time that TKD is seeded 3rd in the playoffs. They reached the championship game and lost last time, in 2005.
• The Hip has not finished with at or above .500 since 2005, and that has continued a playoff drought for one of the most successful franchises in PFFL’s first decade.
• The Jedi Masters miss out on postseason action after advancing in the last four seasons. On the bright side, this season was the 2nd highest scoring in club history.
• Turd Ferguson rebounded from a brutal 2007 to return to the playoffs with an identical-to-2006 seed of 5. This is the 5th winning season in Turd’s 11-year franchise history.
• Winning Beer Money struggled to the worst record in franchise history, including their 2nd lowest point output ever (second only to the 5-8-1 WBM team of 2001).

Season High Points

Congratulations to The Jedi Masters who locked up the highest point total in the league.

1. The Jedi Masters – 1438.61
2. Hedfullalicker – 1397.72
3. SaaBB – 1378.92
4. Post Mortem – 1340.98

Season High Points Against

Thanks to The Hip’s DeAngelo Williams, Hedfullalicker claimed the hard luck title with the most points scored against. Of course, it’s not really hard luck when you make the playoffs as the top wild card.

1. Hedfullalicker – 1357.14
2. The Jedi Masters – 1332.48
3. CSPJ – 1325.68

Recap Babe

Jessica Alba, post-pregnancy, in a photoshoot for Campari, which I had never heard of before. According to Wikipedia, Campari is an alcoholic (alcohol 20.5%, 21%, 25% and even 28% depending on which country it is purchased) aperitif obtained from the infusion of sixty ingredients, combined and macerated in a blend of distilled water and alcohol. Campari is a type of bitters.

Whatever, all I know is that Jessica looks fantastic.

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Here we are at the end of another regular season. Following this week’s action, I’ll try to spend some time looking at the trends in the league this year. I’m not sure, but it seems like there’s been a little more parity scoring-wise, at least among the playoff contending teams. I don’t think any one team was completely dominant from the top to bottom of their roster. It’s weird, but it almost seems to mirror the NFL where there are a few not-so-good-at-all teams and then a bunch of decent-to-great teams depending on which week you look at them.

View the Week 14 Game Center

Week 14 Matchups

• Duany Duany Tanning is looking for a split in their season series with Kramerica, after suffering an 11-point loss back in week 8. Kramerica has won three straight in this matchup, but DDT has won both week 14 meetings (in 2005 and 2006). The winner this week takes a one win lead in the 9-game all-time series.
• TKD looks for the season sweep of SIAP this week. A sweep is a rare occurence when these two are in the same division. This is the sixth time they have shared a division home, and 5 of those times, the season series has been split. The only exception was SIAP’s sweep in 2000. This is the 15th career meeting between these two, with each currently holding 7 wins.
• Post Mortem and Camel Toe meet for the second time this year and third since CT joined the league. In week 14 of last season, Camel defeated Post by 15, while Mortem crushed Toe by 29 7 weeks ago.
• Hedfullalicker is looking for a fourth straight win to end the season when they take on The Hip. The Hip leads the career series, 9-6, but Hedfullalicker won their week 3 matchup by 30. This is the fifth time these two have been in the same division, and a Hip win would make them 5-for-5 in season splits in those seasons.
• Double D and Turd Ferguson meet in the final week of the regular season for the third time. Turd beat DD in week 14 in 2005, while DD won last year. Turd leads the all-time matchup, 6-2.
• The Jedi Masters and their faint playoff hopes meet up with the eliminated Chain Smokers this week. The Jedis beat CSPJ back in week 8 by 51 and lead the historical series, 3-2. Their in-season schedule matches the only other season in which they were in the same division — 2004, when the Jedis won the week 8 and 14 meetings.
• Sharp as a Bowling Ball looks to complete the sweep of Winning Beer Money in their season series this week, and end the year on a 4-game win streak. SaaBB has beaten WBM two straight times, but the overall series is knotted up at 5-5-1. WBM’s last win over SaaBB came in their only other week 14 meeting, in 2006.

Playoff Races

I’m not going to repeat my insane ramblings from the week 13 recap, so if you’re interested in getting sort of an idea about this week’s playoff scenarios, check out this article.

Record Watch

• Post Mortem and Tappa Kegga Day are both looking to go 7-1 in division play. This would put them into a tie for 4th on the list of best division winning percentages. TKD has finished 7-1 in division play twice, in 1997 and 2005. Post Mortem’s best only division record with more than 6 wins was in 1997 when they went 8-0.
• SIAP and Post Mortem have already locked up spots in a tie for 7th best non-division win percentage with their 5-1 performances outside their respective divisions.
• If Post Mortem defeats Camel Toe, it will mark only the 4th time that a team has won 12 or more games and the 3rd time a team has lost 12 or more.
• The Jedi Masters need 105 points to crack the top 10 season point totals while Camel Toe needs to score less than 107 to get a spot on the 10 worst season point totals list.
• The winner of the SIAP-TKD matchup will get their 90th regular season win and sit in 2nd place on the career regular season wins list. The winner also becomes only the 2nd team in PFFL history to hit 50 division wins. If SIAP wins, it will be their 100th win overall.

Preview Babe

Those of us who went through puberty in the 80′s remember Carol Alt from the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issues. Well, she just turned 48 and decided that now would be a good time to pose for Playboy. So, yeah, here she is. Naked. At 48 years old. Sure, there is probably a fair amount of image cleanup going on here, but she still looks pretty dang good.

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View the Week 13 Game Center

View the Automated Week 13 Recaps at myFantasyLeague

Week 13 Highlights

• DDT now leads SIAP 7-3 all-time after completing the season division sweep.
• Double D owns a 7-2 advantage over Kramerica after splitting their season series.
• SaaBB locked up the #2 seed in the playoffs with a win over TKD, extending their series lead to 9-5.
• Hedfullalicker handed Post Mortem its first division loss of the season, earning a season split in their matchup and eating into PM’s overall matchup lead of 12-6.
• The Hip earned a season split of its division series with Turd Ferguson but still trails the all-time matchup 8-5.
• The Jedi Masters continued their dominance over Camel Toe, winning their third meeting in three tries. In those three games, they have outscored CT, 385.31-200.06.
• WBM beat CSPJ in a squeaker, securing a season series split, and extending their career series lead to 5-2-1, but knocking both teams out of the playoffs.

PFFL Survivor

Sharp as a Bowling Ball took a huge lead in the Survivor finale. They now lead CSPJ, 103.25 – 51.35.

View the current Survivor Standings

Postseason Races

East:This division race has become much simpler. If Tappa Kegga Day wins in week 14, the division is theirs. If TKD loses, and Kramerica wins, then Kramerica wins the division in the last week of the season for the second straight year. If TKD loses and Kramerica loses to DDT, the division crown still belongs to TKD based on a tiebreaker advantage over KI and DDT in that three-way scenario.

Central: Sharp as a Bowling Ball has won the division

West: Post Mortem has won the division

Wild Card: Things are interesting here, and I could be wrong, but here’s what I’m pretty sure of:

In with a win: DDT and Turd Ferguson. 8 wins gets you mathematically in in 2008.

MUST win and get help: The Jedi Masters. The Jedis have one scenario that gets them into the postseason: Jedis beat CSPJ, SIAP loses to TKD and The Hip loses to Hedfullalicker. This would create a three-way tie between TJM, The Hip and SIAP. Since they did not all face each other, it would come down to total points, where the Jedis have a huge advantage. A win by either The Hip or SIAP and the Jedis are toast.

Probably in, but should focus on winning to avoid this scenario: Duany Duany Tanning. DDT has one scenario which would put them in a tiebreaker situation that they could lose. If DDT loses, Turd loses, and SIAP and The Hip both win, all four of those teams would be 7-7. DDT would lead SIAP based on a season sweep, but in the next step, vs The Hip and Turd, The Hip would likely move into the playoffs on points, and Turd currently leads DDT by 9 points. If DDT can make up that 9 this week, they would get in in this scenario, if not, The Hip and Turd would be in. This scenario is obviously pretty bad for SIAP too.

Another team probably in, but is better off just winning: Turd Ferguson. In addition to potentially being involved in that tiebreaker with DDT, a Turd loss combined with wins by The Hip and SIAP would create a three-way tie even if DDT wins their game. In this three-way tie, Turd vs The Hip in the West would come to points, and Turd currently trails The Hip by 32. If they don’t make that up, either The Hip or SIAP gets the final spot (SIAP leads The Hip by 28)

If one wins and the other loses: The Hip and SIAP hold a lot of control over the final playoff spots. If one of the two wins and the other loses this week, then things are clear, the winner is in, the loser is out.

Key tiebreaker considerations:

• SIAP currently leads The Hip by 28 points
• SIAP currently leads Turd Ferguson by 60 points
• The Hip currently leads Turd Ferguson by 32 points
• Turd Ferguson currently leads DDT by 9 points
• The Jedis beat everyone in points tiebreakers
• Winning Beer Money loses to everyone in points tiebreakers (which is why they’re out despite being able to partake in some 6-8 tie madness)
• The Hip beat DDT head-to-head and DDT beat SIAP head-to-head

I’m not even considering trying to figure out all the wild card seed implications…

IN: Post Mortem, Sharp as a Bowling Ball, Tappa Kegga Day, Kramerica, Hedfullalicker
OUT: Camel Toe, Double D, CSPJ, Winning Beer Money

Record Watch

• DDT hit the 10,000 regular season point milestone this week. It took them 111 games, tying Post Mortem as the fastest two teams to this mark.
• WBM’s 53.01 points is the 8th lowest point total in a winning effort
• The Jedi Masters’ record 13 wins in a season is now safe
• Camel Toe’s 11 losses ties them for third most ever
• Hedfullalicker secured their 15th high point week all-time

Season High Points

The Jedi Masters soared back into the season high points race lead this week, in what is, in all likelihood, a three-team race now:

1. The Jedi Masters – 1319.21
2. Hedfullalicker – 1296.82 (22.39 PB)
3. Sharp as a Bowling Ball – 1294.66 (24.55 PB)

Season High Points Against

Camel Toe did the Jedis no favors scoring so low this week while Post Mortem’s 100+ point total helped Hedfull. Interestinly, the Jedis face CSPJ this week, so those two teams are in position to help each other, with the loser being in the best position.

1. Hedfullalicker – 1271.96
2. The Jedi Masters – 1228.14 (43.82 PB)
3. SIAP – 1216.07 (55.89 PB)
4. CSPJ – 1206.28 (65.68 PB)

Recap Babe

Jennifer Hawkins is from Australia. She was also Ms Universe 2004. She’s pretty.

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